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Whoops. Been there broke that. Let me explain.
I met a girl about a month ago who was the kind of cute that makes you nervous. So nervous that you find any excuse to keep hanging out with her. That includes asking strangers on the street if they know where to find the Lion King movie. Don’t judge, she said she’d hang out longer if we found it. Okay, judge a little.
While we didn’t find Simba, we did find RCN On Demand. And wow, they have a classy selection of Disney throwbacks. Like any normal first in-home hangout with a crush, we watched Mulan until 3 a.m. When the Huns were finally defeated, it was off to bed.
Now, I still blame the Disney daze and late night vertigo for this, but here it goes...I got into bed with my jeans on. I mean hey, I didn’t know what her policy was on pajamas. So I crawled in with my denim. I was called out quickly.
“Um, you’re gonna wear your jeans”?
“Oh, no. Of course not.”
So after i changed into shorts, I got back into bed with her. But then we just went to sleep. We woke up, kissed in the a.m., and I haven’t seen her in a month. Hakuna matata is some bullshit.
The point here is that transitioning from digital dating to real life can be tough. You can’t wait 20 minutes to respond to a question like you can on Tinder. Even worse, you can’t use emojis when you’re face to face.
But the real problem is that your overall behavior has to change. Right swiping while you’re on the toilet isn’t exactly going to work in person. If it does, you’ve found your soulmate. Make sure your new home together has lots of bathrooms. And Wi-Fi. High speed Wi-Fi.
