For me, it’s not referring to physical growth, which of course is important, but mental growth. It refers to flexing that muscle in your head.

When you’re in a relationship you often do things together. You travel together, dine together, socialize together, exercise together, take classes together and seek out entertainment together. If you live together you do even more. Together. When you’re in a relationship you always have someone with whom to do things. These experiences help you grow. And you grow together.

But when you’re single doing things alone can be a bit more of a challenge. Nobody likes doing things alone. Sure, you can do things with friends but they’re not always available. And they don’t always want to do the things that you want to do. So you might deprive yourself the experience of doing something you really might enjoy. And when you deprive yourself an experience you deprive yourself the opportunity to grow.

Now I can be pretty independent at times but even I don’t always like to do things by myself. Every now and then I make a concerted effort to rely on nobody but me to create experiences that I know I will enjoy. Experiences that I can share with others later. Experiences that will help me grow mentally. For me that means taking a class (I am a far better student today than I ever was in school). Most recently it was architecture, photography and screen-printing. It might mean travelling. Exploring someplace new, whether near or far, and meeting people along the way is like brain food for me. Or it might be something as simple as going to the movies by myself.

Whatever it might be, make the effort to do things by yourself. You’ll learn new things. You’ll keep yourself entertained. You even might make some new friends. Most importantly, you’ll grow. Which is far better than the alternative.