that follows the lives of a group of lesbians. Nope, I’m talking about the other “L” word. I’m talking about the word “love.”

It is arguably one of the most used words in history. And although many words like “hello,” “goodbye,” “thank you,” and their various forms have probably been used more; the meaning of the word“love” holds such a greater power than the others. An infinite amount of greeting cards have been written about love. In fact, the entire greeting card business is based on expressing love. Countless movies have been filmed about it. A million books have been written about making it, enjoying it, fantasizing it, finding it and losing it. And so very many songs that will either make you smile or bring tears to your eyes have been crooned about it. It was a song that got me thinking about love and how we use the word today. The Avett Brothers will tell you “three words that became hard to say, I and love and you.” Regardless of what they mean in the context of their song, those three words together, “I love you,” should always be hard to say. And they should be easy to say. Confused? Read on.

In my opinion, we as a society throw around the “L” word way too much and way too easily. So much so that it strains the meaning and its power. When you muster up the courage to be vulnerable, the courage to utter the words, “I love you” to someone, it should be difficult. You’ve given this great thought. You’ve thought about what this person means to you. You’ve made the decision to say it regardless of whether you think they’ll return the sentiment. You have opened yourself up to a deep emotional connection to this person. It should be hard to say.

But I have witnessed oh so many times, and I will never understand it, how someone can profess “I love you” to someone but after a break-up behaves as if they don’t know the other person’s name. One day its “I love you, I love you, I love you” and the next day you see each other across a crowded bar and behave like you’ve never met. The love disappeared like a sock on laundry day. Where did the love go? And what about the married couple that has children and gets divorced? They loved each other so much they started a family. They are forever bonded by these children that are a physical reminder of their love. I understand that in some cases there might be anger brought about by the nefarious behavior that may have caused the divorce. But anger and love are two very different things. You can be angry and still love someone. Just like you can lose respect for someone but still love him or her. If you truly love someone you wish them well, you always wish them well. Love isn’t about them. Love is about you. You choose to say, “I love you.” And when you do, you must say it unconditionally, with no expectations. You must say it regardless of the rewards of happiness or the consequence of heartbreak.

Give it some thought. Give it some very deep thought. And when you finally make the decision to utter the “L word” you will do so because it is how you feel deep in your heart. That’s why “I love you” should always be hard to say. And then, when you say it, you know it comes from a place that has no bias. That regardless of what circumstances may unfold, there was a reason you uttered that word to that person in the first place. And that’s why saying “I love you” is easy to say.

The “L“ word holds great power and should not to be squandered or abused. Use it responsibly.