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Singles Say

Wait. What? I'm Single?

Getting to Know Me

  By | Sunday, 17 April 2016

This was not supposed to happen...

 

I went though my young adult life thinking that I knew what my future looked like. I had it all figured out and when life took turns, I adjusted accordingly. Sometimes I got mad, sometimes I was glad and sometimes I just resigned myself to the change and worked like crazy to get balance back. I never thought that despite all the twists and turns of life, I would end up single.

I was a “fixer.” I had what it took to make things work. I wanted more than anything for things to work and for our challenges to make us stronger and wiser. I had a good attitude and most of the time a grateful heart. I had a commitment to my marriage and to my family that I would not take for granted. I worked to keep it all together.

And then I couldn’t. I ran out of steam, willpower, energy and maybe even love. I ran out of the ability to convince myself that what I was working so hard to preserve was worth preserving. Wow. That’s a rough statement. Hard to write and even harder to admit. But it’s the truth. It’s what happened and now I am single.

I am incredibly focused on making this single life more truthful, more authentic, more loving, more real and more mine. While I wanted nothing more in the world than to have my married life comprise all those things, I had to surrender to the fact that it did not. I had to love myself more than I loved pretending that I had the family life and marriage that mirrored who I was in mind, body and soul. I was hanging on to what I wished it was until I woke up and allowed myself to see the reality, admit the truth and do the bravest thing I’ve ever had to do.

Become single.  

4 comments

  • Comment Link Rshusted Wednesday, 20 April 2016 17:34 posted by Rshusted

    You "Rock", Kristen Lee. Love,your special admirers. We are proud of You!!❤️

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  • Comment Link Polly Tuesday, 19 April 2016 18:36 posted by Polly

    It has taken a long time for me to realize that I can not "fix" my marriage. I have chosen to stay married for now but know many who have taken the plunge into single life. I admire you for embracing the single life. May this next step on the journey be truly authentic and full of love.

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  • Comment Link Leigh Ann Tuesday, 19 April 2016 18:34 posted by Leigh Ann

    So proud of you for being true to yourself and surrendering to a new beginning!

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  • Comment Link Laurie Tuesday, 19 April 2016 17:41 posted by Laurie

    Thank you for your courage to share! Wishing you health and happiness and an open heart as you move forward with your life!

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